Help others. It’s always good to help others. But definitely don’t leave yourself behind.
You should be bringing your own dreams to life, not just merely helping other people to create theirs. Make yourself a priority as much as possible. It’s not selfish – it’s an absolute necessity. Your own progression takes motivation, dedication, discipline and tenacity. The pursuit of self-improvement to realise your dreams needs work on a regular basis. So, don’t constantly put your goals on ice because it will just make you miserable.
I have come across quite a few people who have had the potential to do amazing things with their lives, but failed to live fulfilled lives due to always putting others ahead of themselves. Although very depressing, it doesn’t mean that they are unable to rectify their situation. Indeed, while you are living it’s never too late to start a new chapter.
Here are some tips to help you remain focussed on achieving your own goals, whilst simultaneously helping others achieve theirs.
1. Prioritise your own stuff first
Ensure you have done what you are supposed to be doing first. Your progression is just as important as everybody else’s. Carve out some time in the day or week that you can dedicate to helping others and try and stick to the time allocated for this. To do it the other way around risks the danger of your own plans falling by the wayside.
2. Ascertain why you have been asked
You have to be able to identify whether the request for help is genuine, or whether the person asking if just using and abusing you. You don’t want to be lumbered with work simply because the person asking you is lazy, thinks the work is beneath them, or would rather be getting on with things that helps their own advancement. You are not a lackey after all.
3. Avoid helping constantly ungrateful people where possible
Equally, you don’t want to be find yourself in a situation where you do all of the donkey work, yet get none of the credit, an acknowledgment or even a thank you. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying to assist people just to have praise showered on you, but a little gratitude does go a long way. Also, if the shoe was on the other foot, would the person who has asked you for help be more likely to return the favour or simply ignore you?
4. Be selective with your assistance
You don’t want your assistance to always be expected. Be selective with what you help with. People should respect your time and energy exerted completing their task. Don’t let people sign you up for things without your consent. Family can be guilty of doing this. Hearing comments like, “Oh, don’t worry, Nadine will do it,” without any regard to my time, schedule or commitments can be incredibly infuriating! Although it was awkward to object to family members and others in the past, I no longer tolerate it. Being related to someone or knowing them for a long time, does not allow someone to take advantage of you. Put your foot down and stand your ground!
Make the most of your life. Don’t waste unnecessary time. Move forwards and achieve great things for others, but more importantly for yourself. 😊