DATING SOLO

So your family, friends and/or partner just aren’t interested in what makes you interested.

Cinema Ticket

What do you do?

Moan about it?

Beg them to change their minds to the point of seeming desperate?

Be miserable as all the things you want to do pass you by?

Again. And again. And again.

I’ve been there and it sucks!!

It is very annoying when you do your best to accommodate other people’s desires yet the sentiment is not requited. You realise that things start to become extremely and constantly

one sided.

But there comes a point in your life when the straws eventually break the camel’s back. And my dear, you are the camel! Obviously everyone has different passions, which in some cases, can be poles apart from our nearest and dearest, but compromise should factor somewhere into the equation.

Well, in an ideal world. But it unfortunately this isn’t always the case.

Enough is enough.

Eventually you will just have to learn to pick yourself up and pursue your interests yourself. Life is precious and is supposed to be experienced in multicolour. Why deny yourself a happy and exciting life to just exist in black and white?

This is what I did after multiple failed attempts. I would always threaten to do things myself, but my resolve would weaken and I would chicken out, trying to find an excuse as to why I hadn’t gone through with my plans. There were 3 things that were preventing me from being successful in my mission. Can you guess what they were??

1. Courage

2. Determination

3. Fear of judgement from others.

I resolved to be brave and go to the cinema by myself. (Not necessarily a massive thing for you but it was a gigantic feat for me at the time!). I deliberately picked one of my days off where my nearest and dearest were working so as to try and not rope them into coming with me. I ensured that I arrived early at Westfields Stratford (a gorgeous shopping centre!) so I wouldn’t miss the showing. By now I was getting a little nervous, but each step that brought me closer to my cinematic destination, made me swell with pride. I strode up to the counter.

“Can I help you?” the member of staff asked.

“Yes. I’d like one ticket to see Devil’s Due.”

I paid for my ticket and my popcorn and went to find my seat. I was surprised that

1. there weren’t many people

2. there was already someone there and he was by himself too.

A few minutes later, two other couples entered, all loved-up. As the lights went down and the film commenced, none of that mattered. In hindsight, I should have started with a romcom or something not so frightening. While the couples were holding each other during the scary parts, I was reduced to screaming, clutching my coat and hiding behind it. But it was worth it. At the end of the film, when the lights flickered on I rose and strode out feeling ten feet tall. I had achieved a major milestone and I was so proud of myself! My next task was to forage for food, which I did in the food court.

As I was eating, I realised that:

1. going solo wasn’t that bad. Before, I had inflated it so much in my head that I had psyched myself out.

2. others do it too.

3. no-one is really looking and forming judgements about you if they see you by yourself. But…

4.  if they do, who cares what they think? Don’t let others spoil your enjoyment.

Nowadays, doing this would not pose a problem and I am happy that I have grown in my experiences and ventured further out of my hidey-hole.

What’s next?

Anything and everything.

The world is our oyster!!  Embrace it with both hands!!

 

Credits: Picture by Sarah Prye

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