There are a lot of ‘control freaks’ out there.
I’ve certainly met more than a few. You’d perhaps think you would experience it less as you grew older – being wiser and more able and confident to make more decisions independently. People would take a step back, letting you flourish and mature into the person you want to be.
Free to steer your own ship.
Free to design your own destiny.
But this isn’t always the case…
It is highly frustrating, especially when an oppressive ‘control freak’ wants to mould you into their image and likeness. Nothing you do is ever good enough unless it has been awarded their god-like seal of approval.
Maybe they think they are wrapping you up in cotton wool, but in actual fact their actions are more akin to a Boa Constrictor crushing your life-force.
They squeeze your free will and your sense of self so tightly that resistance seems futile.
They are the bad boss of big decisions you may have to take.
They are the monster that malevolently monitors your minor moves.
- You lock the door – they double check it (or even worse, unlock it themselves, only to relock it!).
- You plan a journey – they must also plan it since you are obviously incapable of doing it properly by yourself. After all, knowing your luck, without them, you would surely end up in Birmingham when your destination is Brighton!
- You relay to them an encounter you’ve had with another person. They patronisingly shake their head and constantly interject as early as your second sentence in. They inform you of what you should have done, and how you should have approached things (their way is always better!), without giving you the chance to finish.
You feel drained, depressed and dejected, and the feeling lasts hours after you have extricated yourself from their clutches. Your head starts to pound relentlessly.
Would it be easier to give in?
To surrender to a dictator, just to keep the peace?
Perhaps yes, in the short term.
But if the ‘control freak’s’ plans for you differs significantly from what you genuinely want, you will be actually setting yourself back. And as the power struggle rages on inside of you, peace within is the very last thing you will have.
To surrender is to slide swiftly down a slippery slope, to become a slave of somebody else’s wicked will.
So stand your ground.
Know your own mind.
This stance gets easier the more times you do it. Each time you decide to do things your own way increases your transformation from powerless to powerful.
And you have the power to control your own life.
You really do.
So how can you combat a ‘control freak’ and keep their tyranny at bay?